Who is a master at the Art of Persuasion? Part 1

8 Jun

Okay, in true helicopter mom fashion, I have certain rules that are non-negotiable.  Among them is the mantra that boys and girls do not need to sleep over at each other’s homes regardless of whether a party is happening or not.  My daughter is being raised during a time of leniency with social outings and among them; many parents are comfortable with co-ed sleepovers.  I have never felt this was a good idea.  Not because I couldn’t trust Beloved, but because I think that teens are pressured enough socially and when placed together, in the dark, hormones raging, things that weren’t planned may happen.

I realize that with twelve kids at one party, obviously 99% of them will behave but better safe than sorry we say.  So when invited to this sort of hang out, our daughter has always been encouraged to attend, and has always been picked up at a reasonable hour.  She has struggled with being the only child that has to leave and many fights have occurred over this situation.  Still, her father and I stood firm that this was inappropriate and not necessary and she seemed to accept our decision.

Well one of her very best friends lives about two hours away.  They rarely get to see each other due to the distance and lack of driving participation from his [yes I said his] family.  He is one of the sweetest boys we’ve met and they have a neat relationship.  Beloved casually mentions that she’d like to go over and stay a few days to hang out.  We have our typical twenty minute conversation on the rules and why we feel they are right and she’s admittedly disappointed but concedes as she’s used to the “spiel”.  The hinting continues for about three days when I wake one morning to a strange sight on my counter.

I creep over in the dark over to see what the heck is parading across the topside of my shelf reassuring myself that thieves rarely leave pink ransom notes, and find this strange message.  art of persuasionMy little gift from heaven is pleading her case, in the most creative way, by offering her presentation of the trip’s events and proposed impeccable behavior on pink sticky notes, fully decorated with stick figures and hearts.

Here is the exact message, notice how she covers all aspects of the items her parents would worry about.  Man, I love this kid!

  • Orlando Wed-Fri
  • Take Pictures
  • Pig Out!
  • Movie Time
  • Video Games
  • Sadie [dog], Music, Walks, Talks
  • Friends since 2010
  • I Promise to answer all texts, tell you if plans change, follow all rules, be on best behavior, keep my phone charged and teeth brushed.
  • Trustworthy parents, trustworthy kids, all of his family is there, my bed is the couch, it’s all good Mom!  Good friends!

Just Plane Dad and me talk about how this child has been trustworthy, how her friend is a good kid, and decide, against everything we always believed in, that it’s okay for her to spend a few days at his house.  Yes, we talked with her at length about the rules while she is away, got the parents phone numbers, reminded her that this is a very rare treat and not to expect a yes to other invites and prayed for the best.

Stayed tuned for what happened…in Part 2.

Hovering high and low, Helicopter Mom and Just Plane Dad

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