Mom Monday-The Father Daughter Bond: The Immaculate Connection

4 Jun

Growing up, I was Daddy’s Little Girl. We religiously watched the Steelers play after church every Sunday (sleeping through halftime on the sofa), and Thursday nights were Matlock and Murder She Wrote. My favorite movies still to this day are the kind that gets you a man-card: Dirty Harry, Die Hard and Delta Force.  I can remember the few times he taught me to throw a football or shoot a basketball more so than I can remember my mother showing me how to apply makeup.

Rafa and the Kids The Father Daughter Bond
Every year for my birthday, my father took me out on a date. Just him and I. Any restaurant I wanted to go, no matter the cost. He passed away in 1999, and wouldn’t you know? Every year for my birthday since, I dream we are having dinner somewhere.

Michelle and Dad watching TV

The father daughter bond is one of the most special things this life has to offer a little girl. That bond probably prevented a lot of psychological issues and encouraged independence. Most of my conversations about life took place with my father, and even though he’s not around to tell me what he wants, I have a good idea of what he expects of me still. He may be gone, but I still am not allowed to have a tattoo. This year, I will be 37. I can’t wait. That’s the age my father said I’m allowed to start dating.

 

I want my children to have the luxury I had. It was so important, when I was dating (obviously against my father’s wishes), I looked for father figures.
My husband has a list of flaws that I’d gladly write for you in the style of a Facebook status or raging poem, but I’ll take all those flaws because no matter what, he’s a great dad. I don’t have to make him take the kids anywhere or spend time with them like I have to when it comes to picking up after them.

 

Through the years, he has had no interest in doing the things I do with the kids. He has his own things he likes to do. Things he came up with on his own. I believe that’s the only time he’s ever taken an initiative!

Rafa and the girls at the river

His favorite place to take the kids is the mall. Every time they go, they first eat at the food court so he can get his favorite Chinese food. Then he takes them to the arcade to blow 40 bucks on almost-broken, overpriced games to get enough tickets for the kids to bring home an eraser and a dum-dum pop. They ride the train, play in the play area, and take advantage of any of the mall’s temporary visitors with rock climbing and various swing rides. Movies are also a thing they do. I think he took the kids to see Big Hero 6 over 10 times. And off course, he loves taking the girls shopping… at FYE and Game Stop.

 

As much fun and expensive the mall can be, I think my kids will remember most–the Look-out. In the neighboring town, a half hour drive away, sits a spot on top of the tallest hill (like Dora’s Mountains) where you can pull over, get out of the car, look at a couple stone memorials and pay 25 cents to look at the view of the city from a set of binoculars. I have never joined my husband on these excursions, and I purposely don’t join them to preserve the father daughter bond with it. The girls enjoy saving their quarters for this event.

 

While he was never a huge fan of playgrounds, he does love taking them to a park where they can walk around, explore, and the kids can ask a million questions. Every man has his own personality, and the bond he has with his children, especially daughters, are just as unique as the man. It doesn’t matter what you do as long as you and the kids are having fun on a regular basis. The talks, the quality time, the memories all form naturally.

How can you help strengthen that bond this month?

 

Michelle L. Grewe is mom to 3 girls. An Air Force Veteran. A writer. A graphic artist. Fontographer. And an Avon Lady.  You may find her at Crumpets and Bollocks or on Facebook and TwitterMichelle Grewe of Crumpets and Bollocks

5 Responses to “Mom Monday-The Father Daughter Bond: The Immaculate Connection”

  1. Sharisse February 27, 2016 at 10:45 PM #

    I agree that the father-daughter bond is such a special one for a little girl! I was such a daddy’s girl growing up, and I feel like I still am as an adult with a child of my own. I have so many special memories of our father-daughter bond, and I’m looking forward to the special mother-son bond I get to share with my little one.

  2. Scarlet February 26, 2016 at 9:20 AM #

    The bond between mother and child and father and child are so important. Both sides offer them a more secure, fuller view of the world. My husband is a good dad too and that is a not a negotiable quality. I am also thankful for the time he spends with them and the many things he teaches them that I don’t.

  3. Crystal February 24, 2016 at 4:35 AM #

    My husband recently had his hours change with an extra day at work. Both he and the kids miss the extra time he had at home with them, and it caused many tears. Because I’m home with the kids on my own so much, I’ve made sure he was the one to teach them how to ride a bike, and they go out on the weekend together. I’m so glad that they all enjoy spending so much time together as this will set the foundations for the children when they are grown.

  4. L. E. Mastilock June 25, 2015 at 2:06 AM #

    A father is so important to a little girl. I so wish I could have had my dad around during the teen years. Even though I never would have showed it, I so needed him to be there. So special that you have those memories!

  5. Anne Campbell June 23, 2015 at 12:58 AM #

    This is a wonderful tribute to your dad and the importance of the father/daughter relationship. I lost my dad 15 years ago, and I think about him and miss him every single day.

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