Let’s define Helicopter Parents for those that don’t understand us

2 Mar

According to many, helicopter parents pay extremely close attention to their children’s experiences and problems, to the detriment of their children.

  • I say, shouldn’t we be involved with our children’s lives?
  • Isn’t it my job to guide her through life’s experiences?
  • Shouldn’t Dad know where his son is after school?
  • Why do some parents feel it’s okay to take a backseat in today’s troubled world?

Since even my hubby and I disagree on some parenting rules, it is difficult to find the right balance of parental guidance and downright pushing.  I stay close [very close], to all goings on and Just Plane Dad is happy to allow more freedoms.  After much trial and error, we have learned to strike the perfect balance for our family, or at least according to us.


Dad playing airplane with daughter as a helicopter parents


I’m demanding, pressuring, cajoling our Beloved to become the best person ever and Just Plane Dad simply shows the expectation by, well, doing it.  He doesn’t feel the need to get in there and micromanage the kid, confident that he’s leading by example.  I know my Beloved is watching me too but I also realize that words are powerful and I love to talk!  We both feel that since we decided to have this precious child, it’s our top priority to raise her, and since this appears to be our one and only big chance to get it right, we work hard at being good parents, even if that means we approach it differently than most and others.


I’ve been reading all of the fodder on helicopter parents that is circulating the web and it seems to me that we need to find common ground or more accurately, middle ground.  Not many things in life are done at “extreme” limits and parenting shouldn’t be either…that goes for over-parenting or free range raising.


While I definitely identify with the Helicopter Mom side, I do recognize the need to prepare our children for the real world like just like Free Range Moms do.  I just don’t think they need to be in any hurry to get out there.

Hovering high and low, Helicopter Mom and Just Plane Dad

8 Responses to “Let’s define Helicopter Parents for those that don’t understand us”

  1. Sharisse March 8, 2016 at 12:02 AM #

    My husband and I are somewhat opposite in our parenting styles as well, but I think balance is key! We still have a really little one, so it will be interesting to see how our style changes as he grows up and how we might parent differently if we have more children.

  2. Anne Campbell March 6, 2016 at 9:22 PM #

    Finding a common ground and supporting each others’ parenting decisions is key. It’s a careful balance, but since my hubs and I are opposite in lots of ways, we work hard to back each other up with decisions about our boys.

  3. Andrea March 6, 2016 at 8:39 PM #

    It sounds like you and your husband balance each other out 🙂 I am somewhere in the middle.

  4. L. E. Mastilock March 6, 2016 at 8:02 PM #

    I like to give my kids a lot of independence and freedom, but I am still very involved with them every day. Parents should encourage each other no matter what their parenting style. Each child and each family is different and we all have to find a balance that works. And it’s not easy for any of us!

  5. Michelle March 6, 2016 at 5:51 PM #

    I know this may sound contradictory, but I think it’s possible for the same parent to be both free-range and helicopter … depending on situation and child. I tend to be more free-range in some areas and hovering in others! It just depends on what’s going on where at any given time! 🙂

  6. Scarlet March 6, 2016 at 5:01 PM #

    To me, balance is key. As is being the best parent we feel we can be and staying true to what we feel in our heart is right. My parents were way too free range. I hope I am somewhere in between!

  7. Crystal March 6, 2016 at 4:04 PM #

    It isn’t easy to strike a comfortable balance. I like to be close to my children, too, and with so much anti-social behaviour around, and so many times the police have to ask on social media, “parents, do you know where your children are”? Setting good examples and letting our children learn who they are and what values are important before they can be let loose to be free range.

  8. Nicky March 5, 2016 at 8:51 PM #

    It sounds like there is a great balance between you and your husband. It reminds me of my husband and myself.

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